Four weeks down...

As of yesterday (February 24th 2015) I will have been working out & really focusing on me for an entire month.

The first two weeks were really amazing. I lost a little over 16 pounds, my energy was higher than it has ever been, and I was excited to have this new routine in my life. The third week saw me struggle a bit.

Valentine's Day happened and my sodium intake was probably a bit higher than it should have been. I stepped on the scale & had gained 3 pounds. I won't lie & say that I took it in stride...that I just shrugged it off and went to workout. No, I freaked out a bit & found myself doing things that the old me would do. I started thinking that it wasn't worth it. I thought that taking a day off from the exercise & healthy eating would be ok. I mean I worked my tail off in the gym...sweated till it was covering everything and I still gained?!

In near tears I headed for the door of the gym. The plan was to go home & sulk. Those numbers were defeating me & I was going to let them sabotage the rest of my day. Heck, I probably would have let it ruin the rest of my week, but as I was walking out I decided to stop by Jenny's desk. Man am I glad that I did.

The high salt intake over week three had me retaining water. Never before had I stopped to consider what that meant but WOW now I know it is a real thing. My conversation with Jenny and my trainer, Jen, left me feeling hopeful that this wasn't a defining moment to showcase something else that I had failed at. With a renewed optimism I went and worked out. I drank a ton of water & really focused on what I what for the next 24 hours which led me to losing 3 lbs. 3LBS!!

The rest of the third week, I held onto that 3 lbs like a life preserver. Anytime I started doubting myself or consider eating like crap I would reach for that 3 lb reminder. Did it help? Definitely. Did it help every time? No. I am still in the progress of breaking a lifetime of bad habits...both mentally & physically. In a perfect world I would make no mistakes & my habits would correct themselves with little effort on my part. Yes that would be a perfect world, but I don't live there.

I live in a world where daily I am stressed over something. In a world where I still want to reach for food to deal with that stress. I haven't yet but there are times where it is truly it's own workout to say no & change directions.

When week four rolled around I was still focusing on what I had learned in week 3. I was in the gym twice a day & feeling good. That was until Thursday morning where I woke up with some of the worst back pain I have felt in a long time. Sitting up straight was a challenge. Sitting slouched over was difficult. Simply put I was miserable.

For a brief moment I considered canceling my time with my trainer & crawling back into bed, but that is what I have done my whole life. I don't want to be that person anymore so I met with Jen for my session. By the end of it I was feeling a bit better. And by that I mean I could sit slouched without tearing up.

After the gym I decided to go see my chiropractor up in Kalispell. It was a bit of an insane spur-of-the-moment decision to travel so far but Dr Neiter is totally worth it. My visit with him had me walking straight with little to no pain at all. I really need to convince him to move to this area lol.

The next 2 days I was traveling back home. Between the weather & a late night hanging out with a friend, I didn't have time or try to make the time to get in any sort of a workout and man o man did I notice it. I felt sluggish and slow. My motivation disappeared so much so that by Monday I wanted to do nothing but sit. It really amazes me how easily I can slip back into old habits.

Just when I think I have a handle on the situation I will go off track in one way or another. I guess I should give myself more than a couple weeks to create new habits? And maybe I shouldn't be so hard on myself. At least I'm better than I was when this started a month ago.

All of that brings me to the start of week 5....how about I put that part in a video. If you've read this far you deserve a break :D

17 days down...

What do these three bags of sugar and 3 1/2 blocks of butter mean to you?

Yes it could be for cookies but...